Bad Day at JRTC

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... the Mi-24 Hind refuels at your FARP.
... you throw your hands up in frustration and the Q-36 directs fire on you.
... you find a CLF team in your breakfast chow line.
... the O/Cs ask exactly how long you've been in the National Guard.
... you finish your Operation Order briefing and the TOC O/C says, "No, really, what's your plan?"
... your highest kill-ratio statistic is your fratricide total.
... your S-3 finishes the Operation Order briefing with, "This worked great in JANUS!"
... the resupply helicopter brings in a slingload of body bags.
... your Civil Affairs team is taken hostage by the citizens of Shughart-Gordon.
... the Cortinian Care Crusade changes its name to the Cortina Mortuary Service.
... you find a CLF team serving breakfast in your chow line.
... your Take-Home Package is classified as an "X-File."
... the O/Cs call Fort Benning to check if you've ever actually attended any courses there.
... the only thing making whoopie is the little yellow light on your HMMWV.
... the CLF team comes to your command post to complain about the quality of chow you've been serving since the beginning of the rotation.
... you receive Change Of Mission at the ISB.
... you can't hear your command net radio because the O/Cs are laughing so hard.
... your S-3 finishes the Operation Order briefing with, "This worked great on the G.I. Joe cartoon!"
... Fire Marker vehicles show up in convoy with your LOGPAC.
... the mayor of Carnis puts a bounty out on your head.
... your Battalion Maintenance Tech gets stuck in his sleeping bag and has to be cut out.
... your S-2 has to go to the North Fort Barber for help completing the SITEMP.
... your company commanders are using your burning attack helicopters as checkpoints for maneuver.
... the COG puts his arm around your shoulder and offers you a Lifesaver before going into the AAR.
... the S-2 and S-3 laser pointers for the AAR are powered by Honda generators.
... you receive a FRAGO from higher headquarters that says, "Run away! Save yourselves!"
... you ask your Scout Platoon Leader exactly how many enemy PDRA vehicles are coming toward your position and he says, "All of them."
... your PSYOPS surrender appeals work-your BSA surrenders.
... the official song of your rotation is "Taps."
... it's just easier to hold the next Operation Order briefing in the PEHA.
... they take away your square on the War Memorial.
... your ADA section up at Live Fire shoots down an entire flock of Red Cockaded Woodpeckers.
... your S-3 finishes the Operation Order briefing with, "This is so crazy it just might work!"
... the most used weapon in your company area is your O/C's God Gun.
... the Govenor blows off your ACC meeting.
... the O/Cs ask the EAD hospital if they'd like a shot at seizing Shughart-Gordon.
... you find World News Network reporters in your fighting positions, correcting your range cards.
... the CLF captures your Admin/Log radio to resubmit your LOGSTAT report and order some new chow.
... your Fire Support Officer briefs that for airspace coordination the unit will use the "Big Sky, Little Bullet" method.
... you see your unit on "Cortina's Most Wanted."
... your Task Force Engineer gets trapped in the concertina wire around the TOC.
... the O/Cs officially change their motto to "Coach...Teach...Mentor...Beat Some Sense Into."

YOU KNOW ITS GOING TO BE A BAD DAY AT JRTC WHEN...

Sisyphus Understands.

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